Amazon locker, parking, and minivan mixup

Yesterday, I decided to get some air and pick up a couple of packages at my local Amazon locker hub. It happens to be inside a Whole Foods.

Unfortunately, a large, white minivan decided to park super close to my car in the parking lot. It was a Chinese female. I just stared at her as I left my car to go into the store. I was not impressed.

When I came out with my packages, I got to my car and slowly squeezed myself into my car. A woman came over and asked whether it was a tight squeeze. She offered to move her vehicle.

Wait a minute. This woman wasn't the same Chinese female. I asked her whether she had the correct van. I made her laugh when I said that she didn't look Asian and I knew that I had given that woman a dirty look for parking ridiculously close to my car.

She owns a white minivan, but the sun in her eyes made her believe that this vehicle was hers. I said that it happens. I wished her a good day and she reciprocated.

She was nice. I liked chatting briefly with her. I appreciated her kindness and humanity.

Weekend and my friend's apartment move

The weekend is finally here. Yay!

My friend and colleague is moving into her new apartment this weekend. She took Friday off from work and let me know through text messages. She has invited me over to her place once she's settled and it's safe to visit friends again.

Getting an apartment in the greater Toronto area does get expensive. She told me that she had asked our boss for a raise. I hope that she gets one, as her starting salary wasn't as great as it should have been.

For the past year, she lived with two roommates. It didn't work out and she prefers having her own space. I get it. We are similar in that regard.

I am happy for her.

My Mac mini works again! I'm moving and deleting photos libraries

After nearly two months of not being able to boot up my Mac mini, I tried last night and it worked. Yay!

First things first. I moved my photos library from my Mac mini to external storage. I am currently deleting a number of libraries from my Mac mini.

I take a lot of photos. My current library is 218 GB. No wonder my Mac mini fails to boot up, especially with all the library copies that I have. There simply isn't enough memory to do anything.

Here's to freeing up hard disk space.

My ex's birthday and not wishing him a good one

Today is my ex-boyfriend's birthday. It is the first in a long time where we are not a couple.

Although I am a thoughtful person, I have made the painful decision to not wish him a happy birthday. Saying a one-sentence greeting will prompt communication with him.

I don't want it. It would hurt. Thinking about him still does here and there.

I know how I felt when he had reached out to me a few times since he broke up with me. I didn't like him wishing me a happy 2020. It felt like a farce and incredibly insincere. I didn't like when he wished me a happy birthday last year. He was late, but made the claim that he was still on time. Whatever.

Although I miss his kisses, hugs, and conversation from time to time, the bottomline is that he broke my heart. It's not in my best interest to open up a healing wound by initiating conversation with the very person who hurt me.

Beer, food, and a declined phone call

Last night, I invited my intern to a beer and food event. He loved it. I had a great time, too. The company was welcomed.

I drove him home. We get along well. It was around 9 pm and I didn't want him to take public transit when I could easily drive him home.

While we were talking and driving, my cell phone rang. It was my ex-guy.

I immediately declined his call. I wasn't ready to take it. I didn't want to take it.

I don't know why he wanted to talk to me. He didn't leave me a voice message.

Weird. I am relieved that he didn't leave a message.

I do wish that he'd stop contacting me. He obviously can't take a hint that I want nothing to do with him. He broke my heart. I have nothing to say to him.

These days, things are good. I am finally in a good place.

Getting rid of dry roses

When it was almost Valentine's Day nearly a decade ago, my ex-guy brought me a dozen roses. I loved the sweet gesture. I had the roses dried. They remained in a nice vase, on my desk, ever since.

A few days ago, I threw them away. It was time. It felt good.

I never got fresh flowers from him. It was a one-time deal. I suppose that's why I kept the roses for so long. I wanted to hold on to that special time.

I decided to let that special time go. The memories are fond, but they need to stay that way.

Good weekend and making friends in the dating scene

This weekend flew by. I had a great time catching up with a couple of friends who are here on vacation. I feel well-rested.

The Labour Day long weekend is coming up. I am spending most of it in my ex-guy's hometown. I was there a few weekends ago and I felt good.

Although I still have moments of sadness when I think of him and our relationship being over, I am good. I decided to put out an ad on Plenty of Fish. I have responses. I simply need to sit down and sift through them. So far, folks are nice, wanting to have coffee and chat. I'm good with that.

Baby steps into building a friendship and seeing where it'll take me. It feels like a major step, but it's a positive one for me.

Stronger - then and now

When Kelly Clarkson's song, Stronger, came out back in 2011, it became my anthem on multiple levels.

I was dealing with a colleague who was incompetent. It seems to still be the trend at my workplace these days. This guy was originally my manager. He had issues doing his job. Sleeping on the job will do that. Eventually, he made enemies with everyone, including me, and decided to leave the company.

I was going a back issue during this ordeal. I ended up getting back surgery to remove a disk that was causing a ton of numbness and pressure down my right leg. My guy and I became a couple just before I had surgery. Stronger became my song to get better and be my best self.

Frankly, I stopped tearing up a week ago. I was driving home from work and Stronger came on the radio. The lyrics hit me. It's okay to be sleep alone. The bed does feel warmer. It doesn't mean that I am over because you're gone.

It's trying to find the person that I was before the relationship. I have found her. I am hopefully wiser after this relationship, but I am strong and I will be okay.

In a past post, I had mentioned that I deserve better. I do, both in a romantic relationship and in a friendship. I am perfectly fine walking away from my friendship with him. I don't need to deal with his indecisiveness.

Last Friday, we had lunch together. There were a couple of hints that he still has feelings for me, but I didn't act on them.

"I have always loved your purple nail polish," he said.
"It's not the same colour. The one that you are referring to is long gone. I used the bottle up," I replied.

As we walked out of the restaurant, he touched my lower back. He hasn't done that in ages. I am thinking that it is habit more than anything.

When we got to the office, I simply said, "See you whenever," and walked away. It's exactly how I feel. I am not waiting for you. I don't want us to get back together. It's over. I am moving on and seeking someone who loves and respects me.

As for diving into a relationship, I'm not ready yet. I am going to enjoy some time to myself. If something happens, I'll figure it out then. Right now, I can't handle being in a relationship.

The breakup - for the third and likely final time

It has been well over a week. I needed some time to think about what had happened. The problem is that I have been pretty active and busy that I haven't had a chance to grieve.

My guy decided to call it quits. Quits means romantically. He wants to remain friends.

We have been together for years. For me, the withdrawal symptoms of not being affectionate towards someone have been tough.

I am oddly taking this breakup well. In the past, when he previously broke my heart twice, I was devastated each time. I sobbed and cried.

This one still hurts. I tear up now and again. I haven't gone into full-fledge sobbing or a good cry, though. Perhaps he has changed. Perhaps I have, too.

I am more active now than I was the last two times that he broke my heart. I go out of various meetups. I am working on blog posts here and my side projects. Work has kept me busy.

I am only sad at night when I am not on the move. I sit on my bed, look at my purple sheep named Woolly, and go back to the exact moment when my guy gave Woolly to me.

I don't have that feeling of getting rid of all his stuff. I hug my purple plush sheep and I'm good. He is always smiling back at me.

In the past, I had to sever any relationship after we broke up. Part of me still wants to, as it has aleays been easier for me to heal. There were recent periods when I would say hi in a text message to him and I wouldn't get a thing. He would not communicate with me for weeks. I knew that something was up.

I said to him that if we were to be friends, I need better communication. Otherwise, I am perfectly find saying goodbye to him forever. He said that it wouldn't happen. In this regard, as much as he is my best friend, he actually needs my friendship more than I do of his. I will give it a shot. If I hate what we have, I will walk away. I have no regrets.

He didn't break up with me because he found someone new. He just has other side projects going on that love and sex have taken a backseat. I have always been accommodating to his needs. For me, I know that I deserve better. I am willing to find it with someone out there when I am ready.

In the meantime, I look forward to spending time with a good friend this weekend. Work is driving me crazy. My guy and I have had lunch a handful of times over the last 1.5 weeks. We have been good.

He asked me if I wanted a hug last Friday. We hugged. I needed it. It felt different, but it felt comforting.

Kelly Clarkson's song, Stronger, got me out of moments of sadness earlier this week. I will explain more in another post.

I am okay. It is a life shift. I'm not even sure if I can call him my guy here. I will probably need to think of a better name.

Decluttering and discovering old photos

I have been doing a ton of decluttering these days. While on vacation, I didn't really feel like doing it until just before I went back to work. I am pretty motivated these days that it's surprising me!

I'm not sure why I held on to so much stuff over the years. I found a couple of photos of my ex-husband. It was early in our relationship. He looked happy.

I had no hesitation getting rid of his photos. I kept everything else. I ended up putting these photos in an album.

For years, I held on to my undergraduate textbooks in two domains that I don't use all that much these days. As much as I love math, I have decided to let my textbooks go. I can always look up information and questions online should I need to.

I donated my books on Wednesday. I recycled an old cell phone. I also donated clothes that I no longer love, but hope that others will.

It feels good to declutter.

Quiet, productive workday when it typically isn't

This week has been busy. I have been working with the new student, preparing for my presentation to the team, and dealing with training another new employee next week when little is in place. With the last item, there is a holdup in the system, which will make training this person without a laptop a challenge.

I have trained a writer without a laptop before. It wasn't fun. I ended up repeating items again. What can you do, right?

It was a pretty quiet Friday, which I liked. Our team generally goes out on Friday, but only two people had said yes. My manager asked if I wanted to still go, as I was one of the yes people. I asked that it be cancelled. Instead, I grabbed lunch locally.

My student was sick. My manager wasn't feeling well, either. He decided to go to his family doctor for an appointment.

I asked the administrative assistant whether I could change my locker at work. Ever since our office moved to this site four years ago, my locker has never budged as far as location goes. I have been on and off teams like there's no tomorrow. I decided to leave my locker where it is, which is the opposite end of the floor from where I currently sit.

For a while, my teams have not changed. There is a free locker right next to my desk. I decided to take the plunge. The administrative assistant was fine with the swap. She got the operations manager to give me the key. I will go into work on Saturday to move my stuff. I am hoping that no one is there. Again, I like doing quiet work without any distractions.

I didn't have a chance to do the change on Friday. I spent it fixing the training materials. My last student did a good job at putting them together. The main problem with her slides is that she points to videos and has to switch between two different file locations.

I decided to include the videos in the slide deck. It's simply a question of playing each video when it's in front of me.

It's nice to do quiet work. It's rare for me, but I do take advantage of it when the opportunity presents itself.

Diametrically opposed periods

On Saturday, I spent the day with a good friend. We have been friends since grade 7.

Growing up, she lived in the suburbs and I lived in Toronto. We both went to the same senior public and high schools in the eastern part of Toronto. We were in touch while we attended different universities. I then moved away to another province and country, eventually finding my way back to the greater Toronto area. She ended up moving to Toronto and staying there. We still got together whenever I was in town and we kept in touch through the years.

In June, she will be moving to eastern Ontario, in a city that is roughly a two-hour drive away from me. It's not too bad, considering that we'll be meeting midway somewhere.

I am excited for her. The change will be good for her. Naturally, I will miss hanging out with her as frequently as we have been these days. However, distance has never been an issue for us.

As weird as this segment will be, we seem to be diametrically opposed in some areas of our lives. We both realized that menstrual cycles are one such area.

She let me know as we were driving to one of our favourite restaurants that she is perimenopausal. It basically means that she is experiencing irregular menstrual cycles and menopausal symptoms, such as hot flashes, earlier than you typically do as a woman. She seems to get getting her period every six months. Her doctor has said that either she will continue this irregular pattern or her period will cease.

As for me, I experienced the complete opposite experience. When I first got my period in grade 7, my period was irregular right from the start. Mine never happened monthly. Sometimes, it was six months later. Other times, it could have been a year. My thyroid checked out fine. I was given pills to regulate my period and so on.

It wasn't until I lost sixty pounds nearly six years ago that my menstrual cycle became a monthly, predictable event. Hormones are interesting. I had lost and gained weight many times in my life, and my period continued to be irregular. It wasn't until I lost a significant amount of weight and kept it off that my hormones stabilized.

So, my good friend and I are like two ships in the night, except that we are Cancerian and often meet by water.

Missing a Skype text

It has been a busy couple of weeks at work. Last week consisted of packing up my desk contents into a box. We have officially moved office locations as of this Monday.

It wasn't packing my stuff that made things hectic. We also had a bigwig executive who wanted an all-employee meeting at a hotel on our last day at the office. The sad part about his talk was that he didn't use a microphone, so you couldn't hear him for at least half the time.

We also had last-team-lunch-at-the-old-office outings and such. I have spent nearly four years working in that office building. It has come to an end and a new era has begun.

I have to tack on an extra ten minutes to my commute to get to the new office. It's not bad now, but I am sure that it will feel chaotic when students go back to school next week. I am not looking forward to the new school year, but I'll be okay once I get used to the sluggish rush hour traffic again.

Last week, my guy (MG) was in India on business. Last Monday, I drove into work. It wasn't until I was in the office that I got my guy's Skype message. I wrote back to him.

We have fun exchanges, especially when we are both missing each other and are horny.

MG: Tried to call you this morning (last night your time), but you were offline. You know that you should be online all the time, right?
Me: I tend to leave home just before 08:00. Am I in trouble again? My data connection wasn't on.
MG: Your problem, not mine. And yes, you're in big trouble.
MG: I've warned you of being offline when I want you. You know what happens when you upset me this way...
Me: But, it's your fault for wanting to contact me while I am driving to work. I can't be distracted while I drive, right?
Me: I am a good girl, so I shouldn't be in trouble.
MG: You can always pull over and tend to my needs.
MG: It's never my fault.
MG: It's your fault and your bottom will get really sore when I see you.
Me: Yes, you have a point there.
Me: True, but for now, by bottom is safe from Mr Meanie.
MG: Not for too long. I'll make it really red and achy.

It's always great when we both know how to arouse each other, no matter where we are.

Intimate time in a conference room

Last Monday, I moved a number of personal items from my desk into some canvas bags and placed them in my car. We're moving offices by the end of this month, so I decided to get a head start while my guy was working on Civic Holiday.

As agreed, I met him in a conference room on the seventh floor just after 16:30. The floor was completely deserted, as expected. I had brought my short grey skirt. I decided to change out of my three-quarter-length jeans and into my skirt in this room.

I waited. I was in front of my laptop, surfing. Moments later, my guy came into the conference room and closed the door.

"Hey, you made it," I said. "Where's your laptop bag?"
"I left it in the training room," he responded. "I couldn't wait to see you."

My guy wrapped his arms around me from behind and groped my breasts. I love when he does that. He kissed the right side of my neck. It was both affectionate and passionate.

I swivelled my chair around to see him. He bend down to kiss me. The kisses were long and loving. He has the softest lips. They are wonderful to kiss. I felt like melting while gently holding his face in the palms of my hands.

My guy sat down in another office chair. We embraced for a good five minutes. It felt good. He gives the best hugs and I love being in them.

He wanted to feel my bare legs, so my right one rested across his lap. My thighs eventually parted while my guy was feeling me up, ultimately rubbing against the crotch of my lacy black panties. He caressed my right hip, noting how smooth my skin was. He had enough room to grope my right buttock, which made me instantly wet.

Moments later, I reached orgasm and came. I rested in my chair and hugged him. He was standing next to me. I reached over and put my hand on his crotch. His member was hard in his pants.

He let his hard cock out of his pants by unzipping just his pants and taking it out from his briefs. I started giving him a handjob while groping his right butt cheek, which turns me on as much as it does him.

"Can you kiss and suck me?" he asked.
"Are you sure?" I asked him, as there is a reason why I needed to make sure that he wanted it.
"Yes," he insisted.

I kissed his erect penis from the shaft all the way to its tip. I then licked the tip for a bit before I started sucking him. I could tell that he was enjoying it.

Then, the unexpected happened. His cell phone rang. It was one of his guests from his seminar. He felt obligated to answer the phone. It was funny, but the guy on the other end was asking about the other restaurant that we had recommended at lunch. I could tell that my guy wanted to get rid of that guy on the phone.

"I thought that it was something urgent," he explained, after he had hung up the phone.
"He wanted the name of the Afghani restaurant that we love?" I asked him.
"Yes. I had to quickly end the call. He was interrupting a perfectly good blowjob!"

I continued on. He was enjoying every moment of it. Normally, my guy is either lying down or reclining when I give him a blowjob. His standing up was a first.

I could tell that he was about to ejaculate. I pulled his fully erect penis out of my mouth and jerked him off. He came all over my chest and his juices oozed down the right cup of my black bra. We were both happy and dopey. We both sat down. His cock was still jutting out of his pants. I was there with cum all over me.

We went to wipe ourselves off. We talked for a bit, which my guy marvelled over the fact that I could remember when he had bought his car and his first business trip in it to Montreal.

When we decided to call it a day, he sweetly kissed me on his forehead. We both went to freshen up before we headed to our cars. My guy showed me his Magic Mount Window for his cell phone. I asked him if he could get me one. He agreed.

We both kissed. I caressed his head, which we both love. We then blew each other kisses as he drove off and I headed back to my car.

Being at the office on a holiday isn't bad at all.

V is for vacate

On Friday afternoon, I had a dentist appointment. Naturally, my guy calls me, wanting to talk. He had about thirty minutes before he had to head off to the airport.

I called him through Skype on my cell phone, as I drove hands-free from my car. He was to arrive on Saturday afternoon. I asked him if I could meet him at the airport or at the office. He seemed hesitant, which made me sad.

"You don't sound too enthusiastic about my seeing you," I pointed out.
"I would only be there for thirty minutes. I have to clean out my cubicle according to the operations manager," he replied.
"I could help you," I replied.
"You would have to drive a fairly long distance to see me," he advised.
"You don't want me to see you," I stated.
"No, I would love to see you."
"It doesn't sound like it. I have one minute before my appointment. I have to go."

I wasn't too happy after that conversation. My guy noted it.

My guy arrived later than he had expected on Saturday. Both his plane and luggage were delayed. I had a feeling that he would call me from the office. He could sense how upset I was yesterday, especially when he figured out that I didn't bother going to the office to see him on Saturday.

We spoke for a bit. He then continued our conversation from the previous day.

"So, did you want to drive over here?" he asked me.
"There's no point. It was pretty clear yesterday that you didn't want to see me and that we have differing points of view."

I could hear him breath in.

"Okay, next time, I will let you drive all the way over to work to see me for thirty minutes and spend 25 cents on gas [with your hybrid car]."
"Okay," I said.
"I will even let you pick me up at the airport. We can hold hands as we drive back to the parking lot. I can then fondle you."

It's not a flat-out apology, but it's pretty close to one from him.

My guy and I reminisced about our cubicles that were once on the seventh floor of our office building. In January, I ended up moving to the eleventh floor again. My guy either works from home, or ends up in either our training or meeting rooms these days. As a result, he no longer needs his own cubicle.

We have had a lot of fond memories sitting across from each other on the seventh floor. We joked a lot. We did work across from each other. He also managed to fondle and spank me in that same area.

Good memories, indeed. More memories are to come, of course!