Thursday, March 30, 2017

My vision

Late last week, I developed a headache at work. I told my guy about it. He told me to take it easy. We both felt that it was due to work.

Last Friday, I went out for lunch with my two students and my manager. I didn't like the food at the restaurant that we had chosen. We asked for separate bills. My manager asked me to read his bill. The print was faint. I couldn't read it. It was dark at the restaurant, too. It was a sign.

On the weekend, I noticed that my right eye's vision seemed fuzzy. I thought that perhaps my astigmatism had become worse. However, my vision has never experienced such a drastic change. It was different. Things looked wavy, such as signs, depending on the angle at which I was looking. Other times, things looked okay.

Monday made me decide to get my eyesight checked out. We had a manager come visit us. His head was alongside the person who was sitting in front of me. I got dizzy looking at both of them. It is unlike me to feel that way. I decided to get an appointment with my eye doctor first thing on Tuesday morning.

I took a sick day on Tuesday and headed to my appointment. After doing a series of tests, including a fancy retina exam, it was found that I have bleeding in my right eye that is affecting some of my central vision. This bleeding explains why my vision seems wavy.

She said that this vessel bleeding is either due to diabetes or high blood pressure. She was leaning towards the latter. I had visited my doctor two weeks ago. My blood pressure was normal.

My eye doctor then asked me whether I was going through some stress. For a while, I didn't think that I was. However, when I think it through, I have inherited another person's workload. My workload was already pretty loaded. I am essentially doing the workload of nearly three people.

My body is saying that I can't handle the stress.

She has set up an appointment for me to see an opthalmologist, which is slated for the following Friday. In the meantime, my eye pressure is fine and she doesn't deem my situation to be an emergency.

I wrote an e-mail to my manager, indicating that I'd need a private conversation with him about my health situation and my workload. I get to discuss that later on today. I do not want my entire team to know my medical condition at this stage, especially when I don't know much until I get more answers.

I will be stating that I need to reduce my workload and pace. I will pass tasks off to my two students. My health is non-negotiable. Without my health, there is no me.

I updated my guy on the situation. He is still hoping that all will be okay, but he is concerned, as am I. He is sweet and told me that he wished that he could hold me.

Even far away, it's nice to feel his love.

In the meantime, lying down has helped me out. I find that I get dizzy if I am looking at my computer for a long period. It's not bad blogging, as it's brief. It's worse when I am working for a full day.


  1. Oh CB...I am so sorry to see this. You are so very right...nothing is worth damaging your health! Sending prayers and healing energy your way.

    Hugs and blessings...Cat

    1. Thanks, Cat! I am hoping that my vision improves.