Monday, April 27, 2015

Passing of the ex-hubby -- reflections of being spanked as an adult by him

I found out about my ex-hubby's passing simply by doing a Google search.

To make an extremely long story short, our marriage was not a pleasant one for me. I needed to make a clean break from him, as it was an unhealthy relationship that I was in for many years. However, in his view, he thought that all was well and was devastated when I decided to file divorce papers.

His health had been in decline for a while. I hope that he is at peace.

When I first read his obituary, I wasn't sad. I was relieved in the sense that the unhealthy feelings and negativity that he cast on me would cease at long last.

However, I have fond memories of our relationships when things were good. I remember our first kiss and how special it felt. He took me to my first musical, The Phantom of the Opera. I felt special going out in a white sweater and black pants. I also got to discretely grope his hard cock towards the end of the musical.

He took me to my first NHL game. We watched hockey as often as we could. I also got the travel bug from him. I wanted to see the world and I still do.

He was the first man who spanked my backside as an adult. I was shy about having my bare bottom exposed, but I wanted to be spanked badly. He made me feel comfortable. He used a wooden clothes hanger, cane, slipper, bare hand, wooden paddle, and many other fun implements. I love being spanked to this day.

I also became fond of giving spankings. He loved being over my knee, with my wearing a short black skirt and pantyhose.

May he rest in peace.


  1. Hey CB...he was once someone special to you and helped you become the woman you are now so of course there will be some sadness. Sending prayers, healing energy and positive thoughts. May he rest in peace.

    Hugs and blessings...

    1. Thanks, Cat. He taught me a lot. I am taking it fairly well. Lots of good memories have been flooding in, which is good.

  2. RIP to your ex-hubby. Glad you have closure. ((hugs))

    1. Thanks, Renee Rose! I suppose that his passing is the last part of my healing process and does provide closure. Thanks for pointing that out. =)

  3. It is so strange that the man you once loved, is gone. You have said goodbye to him a long time ago, and that was a good thing you did, girl with the naughty name. But there will be always a lot of "the first" on his name forever for you.

    So, it is wonderful of you to let him have his peace. True forgiveness is a wonderful thing if you can bring yourself to it. It will give you rest as well.


    1. Thanks for your insight, Han. It is strange that he is gone. I had many firsts with him that will be forever linked to him.

      As cliche as it sounds, time does indeed heal. Had he passed away shortly after I left him, I would have been more emotional and probably less forgiving. And, it's not healthy to hold grudges for long periods.

      It does feel final that this chapter is officially over. I have been writing several other ones since.