My manager can ruin a perfectly nice day

I have an interesting working relationship with my manager. Sometimes, I dig what he does. Other times, I shake my head.

Our team has these brief chats at the end of the workday. Last week, he suggested that each person lead a chat with a topic. I was the first person to say that I liked how casual and natural it flows. We think of topics to discuss as if we were in the office, chatting in the lunch room. It should not be a structured meeting. It's a chat.

Yesterday, a colleague congratulated me on my ten-year work anniversary. Naturally, my manager ruined it by saying that in our human resources system, my start date working for the company is September 24 and that I should contact HR to have it fixed.

Why? I told him that I know what my start date is. Obviously, my three colleagues in this chat knew what my start date was, because they signed my virtual card. He dropped the ball by failing to sign it. He got the e-mail. He chose to not act on it.

Anyway, I contacted HR and spoke to a nice guy. I know that my manager won't and wouldn't do it. As noted, in the system, my start date is correct. However, my signed contract date is September 24, 2012. It's practically two years after I started working for the company, which obviously makes no sense! Anyway, he has a separate department who will fix this issue.

It's always nice when my manager ruins such a lovely occasion. It's not every day that one hits a milestone like what I just did. He could have been more attentive. That's just my take on it.

Anyway, my colleagues left me nice messages in my virtual card. They made Monday far more cheerful.

I got to select a gift to commemorate this occasion. I got a fancy tea steeper. I drink lots of tea, so it will come in handy. It will take a month to ship, which is the downside. Luckily, I am patient.

Change and missing it

Monday wasn't my finer workdays. I found out that a feature that I had written about before I went on vacation was checked in properly. However, the powers that be moved the feature to a different release version while I was away.

Someone had apparently mentioned this tidbit of information in a mass e-mail. I missed it.

Part of me felt bad. I generally don't miss that sort of thing. Part of me doesn't. Communication isn't stellar at work. I get tons of e-mails. Folks can't make a decision.

Luckily, things have been fixed before this software release. I'd feel bad if the software release went out and someone noticed this issue after the fact!

I may take a longer long weekend. I haven't taken a longer Labour Day weekend in ages. I am typically training a new intern in September. It won't be the case this year.

Telling the ex that he's an insensitive jerk

Last night, I had a texting conversation with my ex-guy. He is indeed an insensitive jerk.

He wanted to know how I was doing. I said that he didn't need to check up on me. He said okay and wished me goodnight.

That's when I called him an insensitive jerk. He never asked me how I was doing after he had dumped me. He told me to take a pill when I was experiencing anxiety after he broke the news. Why is he so concerned now? It's a facade that he cares. It's a joke.

To make a long story short, he wants our friendship to continue. He doesn't want a relationship. He does want fun and sex. I told him no back in April. It's still no now. If he wants sex without a relationship, perhaps he needs a prostitute. I know that he wouldn't because he's too cheap to pay for this service.

What nerve!

I told him that I hated him. Hate is a strong word, but I do for the pain, anxiety, and sadness that he has caused. I also said that he confirmed last night that he is an insensitive person who only cares about his hard cock, which is where his brain is.

It felt good to say that it was his loss for dumping me -- that he didn't know how good he had it. I also gave him advice to read books on relationships and friendships. He needs all the help he can get. He can post reviews on his YouTube channel and refer back to them, because he sucks at friendships and relationships.

I basically said that I didn't want what little was left of our friendship and told him not to contact me again.

I slept well. It's quite the change from April where I was so upset. I know that I deserve better. It's just sad that I dated a jerk.

I have removed him as a contact on Skype. It felt good getting rid of baggage.

Changing my profile photo on Instagram and attracting an interesting demographic

I have probably mentioned this detail in the past, but it is related to what I am about to write.

Back in late December, I changed my profile photo on Instagram. I was on vacation in Minnesota and decided to take a rare selfie, which turned out nicely. 

Well, ever since I changed my profile photo, more men tend to send me direct messages (DMs) on that platform. Sadly, 90% of them started with them saying hi. That was it. There wasn't any mention of why they were contacting me or anything else.

The guy that I was virtually dating for nearly two months was different. He said that he liked my profile and wanted to get to know me. It was a good start, which sparked a conversation. Sadly, this guy didn't take no for an answer and was bad news. I have blocked him on Instagram and on my phone apps.

The other day, I decided to reply to another guy. What intrigued me was his profile. He had both Canadian and American flags as emoji.

He wasn't a good conversationalist. I already knew that I needed to ask him probing, intelligent questions to make him open up.

I don't necessarily enjoy when folks need to say that they are intelligent and handsome right off the bat. Some would say that it's confidence. I actually think it's has the opposite effect. I never mention those qualities when I introduce myself to others. I know that my qualities will shine through and others will see me for who I am. I feel that folks needed to state such qualities aren't as confident as they truly are.

What turned me off was his unnecessary capitalization of words and run-on sentences. He had one huge paragraph about what he wanted in a woman. My eyes glazed over. He needed to break his paragraph down to four smaller ones. I am a writer by trade. I can't see myself being with someone who claims to be educated, but writes like he's in grade 8. To me, it's a huge turnoff.

So, I told him all of these details in a nicer fashion, said that it was me and that and it won't work. I wished him all the best. He proceeded to ask me to answer his questions, to get to know me better. Um, no. What part of "it won't work" isn't clear? I stated that I wouldn't respond to his questions, that it won't work between us, and said goodbye. I then blocked him.

The qualities of these men who have been sending me DMs are as follows:

• The man is either divorced, separated, or a widow, has a child, and is seeking a partner to both be with and raise said child together
• He serves the US in some capacity (army, navy, and so on), in construction, or an offshore engineer
• If not in these fields, he is a medical doctor of some sort
• The man is American and hasn't looked at my profile to figure out that I'm not

I'm not interested. I would rather have an honest man who can communicate and start a decent conversation. I would like an intelligent, fun, optimistic, loving person in my life. If he would like to spank me, it would be a nice bonus.

Fizzled chat

I think that my recent chat with a potential dating interest has fizzled. I'm oddly not upset by it.

On Friday, he said that I am always busy with work. I pointed out that it could be a potential problem. He took an early retirement. Already, his remark made me feel guilty for not being available for him.

I need to work. There are bills to pay. I am not at the stage for early retirement. Deal with it.

He apologized. I text him while I break at work. It doesn't seem like it's enough.

We have not chatted since I sent him messages on Saturday morning. He has seen my messages. He never responded to any of them.

It's better that we stop now, rather than getting serious and realizing that our career phases are out of sync.

Dating and chatting online

I have been chatting online with a man who took the first step to communicate with me. It has been good on the whole. He is one of a handful of folks who saw my profile picture change. Social media is interesting.

The downside? It would be a long-distance relationship with this man. He lives in the States. I'm here in Canada. I'm not sure if I am ready to go through that again. My ex-hubby and I had spent three years living apart before we got married. It does work, but it requires effort, hard work, and communication.

This man seems nice and grounded. We are in chatting mode these days. Our schedules don't sync that well, but we do manage to exchange messages throughout the day.

It's different. It's weird being back into the dating scene. I kind of miss verbally talking to people, though!

Road trip and digital love notes

I'm doing a mini road trip in a few hours for work. I do so much prep work to make sure that I know what I am doing and whom I'm meeting. I'm ready to go.

My guy is doing well. He had a quiet birthday. We both miss each other. It was nice to exchange little messages during the day. We'll take love notes, whether digital or on paper. It makes being apart so much easier.

I'm off to bed to try and get some sleep.

Sweet dreams with a text message

It's nice when my guy wishes me goodnight in a text message. It's nice when he thinks of me.

"Goodnight, sweetie," he texted.
"Goodnight, sweet guy," I replied.

And, with that, I'm off to sleep. Sweet dreams!

Travel and scheduling... challenging!

These days, I have been looking at photos that I have taken over the years. Recently, I decided to clean up duplicate photos and reminisce. A vacation for a couple of weeks will do that to me.

It has been a while since my guy and I have travelled together. His business trips have been reduced for a while, thanks to a corporate ban on travel.

My guy has a trip to Seattle. The decision here is up to the customer. Once that is done, we have both decided to spend some time together there.

It hasn't been all that bad with the travel ban at work. It has been nice to spend more time together on weekends. These days, it's trying to figure out which weekend works best for both of us.

Ah, scheduling challenges are so much fun! Thank goodness for text messages, phone calls, and e-mails.

Text messages to quick make the day better

It's almost instinctual these days that when I miss my guy, he will send me a pick-me-up message. It's just gut instinct.

He sent me a quick text message. He hoped that my eye is getting better and that I'm still enjoying the pics that he finally sent me after nearly two years since I had taken them on his phone.

The good news is that my left eye is back to normal. My rash on my wrist is still there, but the hydrocortisone cream that I apply on it seems to be helping.

I can also tell that it's a mutual vibe. He sends me texts more often when he misses me, too. It's nice.