Bonus pay, relief, and friend

I gave my presentation online for work yesterday. It went well. I always feel great and relieved after it's done.

It's raining right now. I like rain at night. I find it soothing.

Yesterday, I got my bonus in addition to my paycheque. It feels good being temporarily rich. I have put the bonus towards paying off my debt, which continues to go well.

It's Friday at long last. I am seeing a friend, who is also my colleague, on Saturday. We haven't seen each other since last September. I am excited to catch up with her.

Speaking to a crowd and not being as petrified as I was in grade 7

Yesterday, I did a presentation online with an audience of twenty people who are my peers, including my manager's boss. I originally thought of creating a PowerPoint set of slides. One member on our team of four just said to present my points that I had summarized as my meeting minutes last week.

Well, I did. He decided to create a PowerPoint for his other group that he was leading. Geez, thanks!

On a good note, my presentation went so well that I have been asked to present it to my entire department. Yes, I will need to create PowerPoint slides. My minimalistic approach wasn't bad at all.

When I was in grade 7 and throughout most of my academic life, I was extremely nervous talking in front of roughly thirty people. I would rehearse a ton before doing any presentation. It helped.

I supposed that my work and life experiences talking within my team, training others, and hanging out with friends pre-pandemic have made me comfortable speaking in public. For yesterday's presentation, I didn't do much rehearsing or preparation work.

It's interesting how things change as you get older.

Layoffs and canned presentation

I normally work from home on Wednesdays. I changed things up due to my two medical appointments and went into work yesterday.

It was an interesting day to be in the office. The good news is that I had a massive full rack of ribs for lunch. There was a deal going on at a local restaurant. I took advantage of it.

The downside was that a snap meeting was held while my student, manager, and I were out having lunch. It's ridiculous to call a meeting fifteen minutes before it starts and during the lunch hour.

It turns out that six people were laid off in my department. It's difficult to tell whether it was due to performance or that they had been with the company for eons. They were gone. Just like that.

One person was on my team. I didn't expect him to be turfed. This person's manager was also let go.

My manager was candid with me during our regular biweekly meeting. He though that he would be the one to go. It was an odd statement. He said that I would be fine.

It's difficult to say whether I am truly safe. That being said, I do my job well. Folks know that if I leave for whatever reason, my department will suffer.

I am hoping that things get better.

In the meantime, there is great news. I was supposed to do a five-minute presentation on Monday with two other colleagues in front of our entire department. That presentation has been scrapped. Yay!

Job analysis and prospective interview

On Thursday morning, i had to give a presentation to my entire team, which consists of over twenty writers from four different locations.

My presentation went well. I had a couple of technical issues. Otherwise, I was pleased with how it went.

I train folks and meet with students so often that speaking in front of groups doesn't rattle me like it used to. Sure, I still get a little nervous. To me, that's normal. It simply means that I care about what I am doing.

I ended up with an odd acknowledgement from my manager in our team meeting later on that day for whipping together a high-level process description for something that I do often. He normally doesn't make such an acknowledgement in front of the team. It was sweet that those in the room clapped. Perhaps my manager realized how valuable I am as an employee.

I am the longest-serving writer in our group and am the overall team lead for it. It has taken me a while to build up to this stage in my career.

With the job interview on Friday, I assessed whether I would be happy in that position. I wouldn't be a team lead. I wouldn't be coaching other writers. I wouldn't be training students. I love all these aspects of my job.

Sure, I would be saving in highway toll fees, travel time, and gas. I would also be taking a pay cut. It's interesting, but money has never been my main motivator. It's how I feel about the job that makes me happy.

All my development work, meaning writing to support our software products, will go to two other writers. I will focus on a migration tools task, performance statistics, and process work.

I have wanted a change and a reduction in my workload for a while. I will continue training students, supporting my team, and more. I like this change.

I made the difficult decision to decline my interview on Friday. It feels right. The recruiter was understanding. It is the first time in my life where I have declined coming in for a job interview.

I let my guy know. As usual, he is supportive. Whatever makes me happy, makes my guy happy, too. As usual, he is his sweet self.

Playing the ukulele again

The good news is that I felt good about doing my presentation on Thursday. My jitters disappeared after the first couple of minutes, which is normal for me.

The downside was that my boss ruined that good feeling that I had with some of his comments. He really does need to be more positive, especially when two interns helped with the slides. Anyway, I let all that negativity drop. I felt good and several colleagues liked my presentation.

Anyway, to change the topic a bit, I just bought myself a purple ukulele. I am going to learn how to play this instrument again.

When I was in grade 3, my parents bought me a brown ukulele and I learned how to play it in school. Three years later, I joined the ukulele group and used the same instrument.

I had to let go of my beloved ukulele over a decade ago. I still think about it in its cardboard box. I am such a sentimental, reflective person.

When I was in Winnipeg on vacation last month, I came across a colourful display of ukuleles at one of my favourite bookstores out of all places. I didn't see a purple one, but I wanted to do some research, to see if it did come in purple.

Tonight, I found what I wanted. It has great reviews. It even comes with a bag. I am living the high life! I can't wait to pick it up at the store.

Nervous energy, in a good way

My guy returns home from camping for nearly five days. It will be fun hearing all about his stories.

I have been preparing for a presentation that I am giving to my peers later on today. I am nervous. I think that it's normal to feel this way. It means that I care about what I am going to talk about.

The weird thing is that my feelings from my past are resurfacing. I feel anxious.

I used to dislike speaking in front of crowds. These days, I talk a lot in front of peers. Yet, I feel that I have a mild case of butterflies-in-my-stomach jitters.

My first bout was back in grade 7. We often did presentations often. I disliked speaking. Mind you, there were a number of other factors that year on top of this issue. I basically skipped a total of a month's worth of classes. I wanted to avoid so much -- people, homework, assignments, class presentations, and so much more.

So, feeling a bit nervous is perfectly good. I know the content well. I have taught it to student interns both past and present, as well as colleagues. If I didn't feel anything, I would definitely be concerned.

Here's hoping that all goes well with my talk today. The crazy thing is that I am slated to give two more presentations in September. I should be a pro at it by then!